Tag Archives: old

Talked to my college roommate

I received a call from my college roommate last night. It had been about six years. She used phrases like magnificent, on the other side of incredible, insanely in love as she described her life. My life is lacking exciting adjectives. It’s been a tough year for me and I had considered it a good year because I persevered. Now, I’m not satisfied.
I need a thesaurus for next year or maybe just for her next call.


There is an elephant in the store

My daughter and I were walking through the grocery store. A person in an elephant costume with a sign around it’s neck walked by. I read the sign out loud, “number sign elephant?” My daughter laughed, it’s hashtag elephant, mom.
It’s all a matter of perspective.
Just an after thought. We didn’t question the elephant in the store, we only discussed my lack of cool because I didn’t say hashtag.

She is 88. Old and funny

Mrs B was an old woman that lived across the street. She was 88.

-She was driving down the street with her back doors open. My brother chased her up the street yelling Mrs B your doors are open. Sadly, Mrs B couldn’t hear. God only knows how far she drove like that.

-Mrs B saw my dogs plastic hamburger bun chew toy on the carpet and announced “oh, my, someone dropped their dinner bun!” She didn’t stop until I finally picked it up and claimed it as mine.

-She asked my mom if she thought she would have a better chance at renewing her license if she used one crutch or two. She thought since she wasn’t quite 90 she had a good chance.