I accepted a facebook friend request a week ago. The request was from a guy I knew who is very successful in the film business. We had been out of touch for a few years. I looked at his FB pictures and was amazed by the incredible pictures of his travels. He travels all around the world! Now I regret accepting his request. I looked at my FB pictures and suddenly feel inadequate. I haven’t posted a picture since I became his friend. I am shocked by the grandeur of his life. I hit a low point in my life and was feeling ok that I’m somehow surviving, now I don’t feel that way.These are a few of my pictures and his pictures.
My picture- Ice cream with my kids. I used all the change I could find to buy it and I had a coupon. I also used the old excuse that I wasn’t hungry because I couldn’t afford another icecream. His picture-at the Italian Rivera having gelato. (Somehow I doubt he used a coupon for his gelato or paid for his flight with change)
My picture-paintings my kids made. (By the way I had a coupon for the two hour art class where they painted. His picture-waiting in line to see The Last Supper. I’m thinking there were no coupons involved here either.
My picture-my birthday meal at chick fil a. His picture-His birthday meal he ate while at the French Alps. (Too bad for him no chicken strips, I assume)
I went to Studio City
He went to Switzerland.
If I could unfriend him I would but I think he would notice. If I post I hope he is just too busy looking at his other friends lives to notice my posts. So if you follow me on FB and notice I stopped posting now you know why. It’s nothing my FB friend did that makes me want to unfriend. To quote George Costanza “it’s not you, it’s me”
I went to visit a new friend for dinner. They are in their early 40’s. I brought my kids, they brought pizza. We were chatting and she asked if I’d ever had flatware fall into the garbage disposal. I said “of course.”
She said “it happened to you, too?”
He said “what did you do!”
I said “I pulled it out.”
They gasped! They said something like how did you do that! I can’t believe it!
In their eyes I became a superhero, I didn’t know why.
She said “how did you get it out?!”
I said “I turned off the garbage disposal and put my hand in and took the fork out.”
They GASPED! They said “You what?!?”
“How?!” “Did you turn the house power off?” “Take the batteries out?”
I said “nope, turned off the garbage disposal, put my hand in, pulled out the fork”
No big deal, it happens.
He said “would you get the knife out of our disposal, it’s been there for weeks and we didn’t know what to do?”
I laughed, I probably shouldn’t have. Then I removed the knife from their disposal.
They gushed over me. It was as if I won a Nobel Prize.
I still wonder how they have survived a combined age of over eighty years.
As I was leaving she asked me to show her how to make a grilled cheese sandwich next time I visit.
I was going through my pictures on my phone. I needed more space so I was deleting pictures and apps. I was going through pictures a friend sent me on dropbox too. There were 250 pictures of her baby being baptized. I decided to delete some of them. I’d never seen the baby and I hadn’t seen her in three years and she lives in Asia now. As I was deleting I got an email from her, it said “stop deleting my child’s baptism pictures!” Apparently I was deleting the pictures in her dropbox and mine. I didn’t know! Now she is upset with me because I deleted her child’s baptism pictures, from my dropbox and hers and that I didn’t care enough about her child to keep all of the 250 pictures.
Yep, that’s a great way to start my new year.
I was reminded of this story by a dear old friend. He said it was the anniversary of this “event”
My friend and I were flying to my parents home for Christmas. It was a five hour flight. We both ate cute little turkey sandwiches cut in four pieces with brightly colored toothpicks holding the sandwich fourths together. Shortly after I ate I fell asleep leaning against him. He said I started to mumble a little in my sleep. We had traveled together before so that wasn’t a surprise to him. Then I got a little louder, and louder. I started saying “aaaaa, aaaaaaaa, AHHHHH” He was getting a little embarrassed so he nudged me a little to wake me. Then I got louder and a littler clearer, “the toothpick, I swallowed the toothpick, I SWALLOWED THE TOOTHPICK”. He said everyone was looking at us at this point. Some were concerned. He was telling the people I was fine not to worry as he tried to wake me. I awoke to people looking at me. He explained to me what happened and I told him I had a dream that I had eaten the toothpick in the sandwich. We laughed and people continued to glance at us. He said he’d never fly with me again, but that was a lie because he has flown with me many times. He never let’s me forget the toothpick story, he reminds me every year on our “toothpick aversary”
I’ve had some ups and downs financially. Really high, highs and really low, lows!
During one of those downs I took my kids to Taco Bell for a “treat”. I could barely afford a few 99 cent tacos. A friend joined us for lunch. She talked about a great new place for lunch and invited me to try it one day. They had the best appetizer and it was only 125 dollars. (125 dollars! Lol) I swallowed my bite of bean burrito and reminded her that we were in Taco Bell, because I have no money. She looked confused and said I know that’s why I invited you for lunch.
I laughed! She looked even more confused.